Earlier this March, heads of the Centipede announced that they would be bringing back the satirical April Fools Issue after a year-long hiatus. They were met with unforeseen outrage. Many writers found the return a mockage of their journalistic skills, feeling forced into writing in the style of Concord Academy’s satirical newspaper, the Scallion. This uprising has led many to ask the question: should CA’s newspapers remain divided?
The Centipede has always been known for its top-quality, professional journalism. We have reported on events from the building of the Centennial Arts Center to every assembly the school has ever had. The Scallion, by contrast, writes humorous pieces of fiction, based upon events in the school and the world. Over time, the CA community has come to rely on the Centipede for our commitment to accuracy and journalistic integrity.
Now, we come out with this issue — full of “jokes.” Looking closer, can these be considered lies? Many, yes. A deviation from our standard quality, truthful journalism will undoubtedly missile the community into believing countless lies, such as that upperclassmen don’t deserve to be demoted to lower-level classes, and that Big Pharma price gouging could possibly be a bad thing. You have to wonder, is spreading this obvious misinformation really worth it in pursuit of humor?
This very question led to the uprising of Centipede editors and writers alike. Many, seeing the “April Fools” spreadsheet, felt fearful but hopeful the Editors-in-Chief simply forgot to change the name. When announced that this was not the case, they truly would have to write satire, papers flew. In fact, one writer who wishes to remain unnamed launched an entire box of Centipede articles across LABS 112. Editors despaired at the prospect of reading and editing failed attempts at humor. Cries of “This is not the Scallion!” rang out across the room while the EICs sat in shock, having thought that this announcement would be met with relief at a break from intensive research and writing.
This outbreak goes to show — sometimes what you have been doing is what you should continue to do. While the community does delight in some occasional humor from the infrequently published Scallion, it is clear the two papers should remain within their respective spheres. We’ll let it slide this year but don’t expect to see more humor in the next.