Every morning, when I walk onto campus, West Campus glistens pristine under the morning sun. (If only I could see this glisten on my car hood, but alas, I have parked miles away from campus since the demolition of the parking lot.) I feel a deep, primal hunger for the new auditorium and gender-neutral bathrooms. But I also feel a thirst: a thirst for something fresh, exciting, and familiar all the same. I am here to advocate for Sky Campus.
Sky Campus, as the name suggests, will be a dome-shaped echo chamber that encompasses all of the current facilities. The dome will resemble a sort of bubble. Under the symbolic and physical guidance of Sky Campus, we will be completely transparent. Our conversations will leave our mouths and re-enter our ears with the sophisticated technology provided by the design. I do not know the engineering details of the design, but I will tell you how the design should be, even if I do not necessarily understand what I am talking about.
Another key feature of Sky Campus is the border security. To access and engage in the echo chamber, you must be selected by a committee and approved by the community. Student and parent volunteers will guard the bubble with varying measuring equipment to estimate how deep your pockets are. You will be turned away if you do not meet the requirements.
I asked a fellow student about their thoughts on Sky Campus. They said, “This is a terrible idea. CA is such a bubble. Why make it more of one? I’m sick of people sharing all of these stupid opinions and ideas. I wish there were a way to filter these disparate views out of our community.” All others echoed a similar sentiment. This is a great demonstration of how Sky Campus will function.
I welcome all positive feedback on this idea. I plan on garnering support for Sky Campus by building two Sky Campuses. Disgruntled community members will work together to break free of the inner bubble, but either accept, ignore, or remain oblivious to the outer bubble — that way, inevitably, the echo chamber will be established and unchallenged. Please join me for an opening ceremony during which we will throw cash at Sky Campus to create the very first echoes.